Missed Opportunity

I have a few regrets in my life. Some are stupid, like I wish I was more brave in my hairstyles, or I wish that we had traveled more before we had kids.

But some of my regrets haunt me. I have had opportunities to help and show love to people who really needed it. Those are the moments that I think I will regret for eternity. One of those events happened just last week.

I came to church about 10 minutes late because Ford had been sleeping in as he always does on Sunday. I sat down in the back of the church, and as I was sitting down, a nice looking woman in a sari whom I had never seen before put her hands out to take Ford from me. Now having had some awesome Indian women friends, I knew that this was pretty normal behavior in other cultures. So she held Ford throughout the worship, until I insisted on taking him back.

After the service was over, she informed me that she needed to talk to me. She took me in the hall and explained that she was from Pakistan and was staying at the shelter with her 3 kids across the street. She said that she had a real problem in that her kids hated the shelter food and were loosing weight. She asked me point blank if she could come to my house to cook for her kids. I froze.

Instantly I thought of excuses not to let her come over -- like I didn't have enough room in my car for all 4 of them, and I hadn't seen michael much in the past few weeks and didn't want to spend my entire Sunday grocery shopping, cooking and driving this woman around town.

I stalled. I made an excuse and asked a deacon if he could help me find a solution for this woman. We explained to her that we would see that she has a place to cook next Sunday when she comes to church. She seemed satisfied, and I went back to my house and didn't think about it anymore until Wednesday when the church deacon called me and left a message to discuss our plan for her.

I again came up with every excuse not to be the one to help this woman. I talked to Michael, and as I voiced my complaints, he listened kindly, but said that he could not validate my excuses....and then i was convicted, like a ton of bricks hit me in the gut. I knew in my heart that God seated her next to me, and this was not only my responsibility, but an opportunity God was giving me to serve him and show love to one of his people. As I realized the weight of my mistake, I tried to leave a message at the shelter for her, saying that I would be there to take her home next Sunday, but they wouldn't take the message. They told me i could leave something in writing, but I didn't. I assumed instead, that she would be there on Sunday, and I could take her to the store and to my house. I began to look forward to it.

But she didn't show up to church last Sunday.

And why would she? She asked for help, and I gave her an excuse. I missed the mark. What love of Christ did she feel that day? We sang songs about God's love, but her children were hungry on that day - and I offered to feed them next week. I admit was taken aback by her direct manner of speaking to me, but as I look back, I see that she was a mother desperate to feed her kids. How would I feel in a similar situation?

She will probably never come back to our church again. That is how opportunities happen. They are here, and then they are gone. I keep seeing her son's sweet face, and I am so disappointed. I had a chance to love on those kids. Who knows where they will end up in life, and I had a chance to talk to them and share my home with them, and I missed it.

I share this story to remind myself to be eager to do good. I looked up eager and actions in an online Bible concordance and these are just a few verses that I found:


1 John 3:18
Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth.

1 Peter 5:2
Be shepherds of God's flock that is under your care, serving as overseers—not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not greedy for money, but eager to serve;

1 Peter 3:13
Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good?

James 2:22
You see that his faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did.

2 Corinthians 9:2
For I know your eagerness to help, and I have been boasting about it to the Macedonians, telling them that since last year you in Achaia were ready to give; and your enthusiasm has stirred most of them to action.

and then Jesus, The Man said:

John 13:34
"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.

John 13:35
By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."