Dear Hair:
I would like to apologize for the disparaging remarks made about you. You have been good hair for a very long time. You are curly, you are straight. You cover me and shield me from the sun. You smell good. You are mostly soft. You are something for my baby to play with. Forgive me for calling you "mousey" and librarian-like. Don't leave the team. The team needs you. It appears that you have slowed down your exit and I'd like to say thanks. Stick with me, and I will treat you to a haircut and color this week. Something really different...
Thanks for the good times. Remember the fly-trap bangs in 1989? Remember when I'd go to bed with wet braids so I could take them out and look like Daryl Hannah in Splash? We've been red, brown, and blond together-short, long and that non-committal in between length for years. You've been braided, teased, bobby-pinned and in countless ponytails. Just wanted to say thanks. Looking forward to going gray with you...someday...not quite yet.
Sincerely yours,
The head
This is too funny! Are you sure you're not a writer in disguise???
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