truth

I have been thinking a lot about perceptions and how people portray themselves.  One night, I spent at least an hour looking at tiny facebook thumbnail pictures of people i have never met, trying to decide what I think makes a cool profile pic.  (jeremy shellhorn has my favorite).   
Sometimes I look at other people's blogs and I feel frustrated because I think, is their life really that perfect?  or maybe it isn't, but they get to decide what they want on their own blog so they edit their life to look perfect.  perhaps I try to do the same.  well, i think it is safe to say I often do the same.  Not because I think my life is so great, it is just that you want to remember the good things and the nice things, not the crappy stuff.  But life is all about the good, the bad, and the messy in-between. 

So today, I have decided to show you what my house looks like on a regular basis when no one is coming over. 

And I want to admit that i struggle with planning events and accomplishing tasks on a to do list.  I am easily distracted by any opportunity to have fun.  Today, i am coming clean that i loose my temper too often with my precious family, and way too often with my dog.  I lack patience - then chastise my son for not having patience.  I am a bad gardener.  I get jealous very easily.  I eat too many sweets after I put my boys down for nap.  i drink too much caffeine.  I am very bad at keeping in touch with people i really care about.  I am a procrastinator.  I don't make my bed every day.  there is more i could confess, but that is enough for now.

I just wanted you to know, that I know that I am so very far from any semblance of blog-perfect.  I am still the same girl whose grandfather once picked up over 100 items off of my bedroom floor.  I am just older now and I pick up before you come to my house. 

My prayer for the past week or so is that God would reveal to me in new ways his love for me.  As an adult in this hurry worry world, I forget to reflect on just how much we are loved by God.  I think a lot about what I "should" be doing, and what I "shouldn't" be doing.  But I often forget to just accept that I am loved - just as I am.  And thank God that he is not done working on me yet.

Here is a verse that comes to mind: Philippians 1:6 (from the Message)
"There has never been the slightest doubt in my mind that the God who started this great work in you would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing finish on the very day Christ Jesus appears."