almost there

we are about halfway through the yearly holiday crazies at the Calloway house.

halloween.  done.

frank's 6th birthday.  done.

crystal bridges opening cocktail party.  done.

now i can finally eat some halloween candy.  

i admit now that i am having a volume problem.  my sister helped me identify this when she was here last.  i am not a terrible mom.  i am far from the best, but i know i am not the worst.  i try to play with my kids.  i take them places, i talk to them.  i make them bored until they come up with creative solutions to entertain themselves - thus stimulating their imaginations and eventually creating the geniuses that will have to take care of me in my old age.

but right now, i am having a volume problem.  when i have just a 6 year old and we are doing homeschooling and legos and practicing our tennis - i am great.  when i am chillin' with the two year old - building train tracks and counting "moneys" and looking at rocks and changing diapers - i am at my best.  when i am cuddling a sweet 5 month old and nursing him and praying over his sweet head and laying on the floor next to him - i am at total contentment.  But.  when they are all together, i feel that i am always neglecting one or another or my husband, or my home or my responsibilites in the greater world.  i am not a good multi-tasker.  i am later than ever these days.  i am actually, legitimately forgetting to attend things.  i am a terrible volunteer at school.  i cannot physically do and be all the places that i want to be.  it is a volume problem.

so i wonder.  is this the Lord teaching me to prioritize?  once i contacted an old friend on fb.  it was just before Ford was born.  I asked her if it was hard to have 2 boys.  She is also a mother of 2 boys and a nurse.  She said, "You'll be great, don't worry.  You're a nurse, just use those prioritizing skills from nursing and put them into practice in your family. "(or at least it was something like that - i can't remember the exact way she said it and i hate to put quotes around something that I am not certain is correct)

but the issue is that as a nurse, i stunk at prioritizing.  you can ask my friends.  they all said I was a good nurse and they would have me as their nurse, but why was I so slow???

I am slow, and relationally driven.  this is why in the last week I have a) forgotten picture day for frank.  b) forgotten about a play I purchased tickets to at the beginning of the year, and c) arrived at frank's school this morning to see that he did not bring his backpack in the car.  (that would be no big deal if his school wasn't 25 minutes away.)  

I am working on my calendar, I am trying to plan better, but this morning I remembered that I just need to ask the Lord for help.  As soon as I did, I felt better.  I am asking for Him to make me more alert and to remind me of all the things I am balancing at once, and to handle them with love whether or not they are done in the way I had imagined.

Frank was devastated when he arrived at school without his backpack.  The first thing that happened was a cool 2nd grader said, "Hi Frank!  Where's your backpack?"
 After we spoke to the teacher, and John's diaper leaked through during that conversation, I knelt down and said, "Frank, its no big deal.  I will get you some lunch, Mrs. Brown is fine, and you will be fine today.  if anyone else asks you where is your backpack, just say you don't have it today.  no big deal."

I am going to try to take my own advice, but dangit if i don't sometimes wish I was a type A person.

sidenote:  i would love to post photos of the many awesome events from this past month.  but i can't find my camera cord....  hilarious.

things ford says at 2 years and 10 months old

skadetti   =   spaghetti (which he hates)

buzz a bobo =  bulldozer  (which he loves)

pa mean o  = I have no idea, but this is what he called the eggplant parmesan for dinner tonight.

daily sayings:

"Mama, I gotta get my Bobby Doggie"


"Mama, can I have a dwink?"

"Mama, I gotta get outta here."


"Mama, can i get a li'l coffee pweeze?"

"Fwank, stop it Fwank!"

"Whas baby john? Baby john is c-whying?  I didn't wake him up, Mama."

while i am not sleeping

today in the car on the way to tennis lessons (not mine), I was changing out the cd in the cd player, and between cds, the radio came on.  it came on to the christian talk radio station 91.3 at exactly the beginning of what I thought was a sermon.  It was clearly and african-american pastor, and as I deeply miss my home church and my favorite african-american Pastor, I stopped to listen.  What I heard was one of those move you to the core of your being sermons.  It was a man, the Reverend E.V. Hill giving a sermon at his wife's funeral.  I am putting a link to that broadcast here.  Not to be depressing, but to be inspiring.  His wife inspired me.  His faith inspired me.  Everything about it touched me.

So, if you are like me, and are always looking for things to listen to or watch while you do dishes and laundry and stuff, you will not regret listening to this.  You can listen to that when the kids are busy doing something else.  Actually all the boys listened to it with me, and frank talked about it later.  He didn't really know what it was all about, but he brought up 3 different parts of the story, and had heard every word.  they are watching everything we do...

 *****

And.  while i am talking about the things that I watch and listen to, here are some of my favorites from the past year.  You probably already saw them all, but just in case:

1.  Downton Abbey.  7 part mini-series for PBS Masterpiece Classics.  Oh yes, I am that nerdy, but when i saw it won all those Emmys, I checked it out.  So good.  you can stream it on Netflix or watch the first episode on PBS.org.  Apparently Season 2 begins in january.  it is worth your time if you like the A and E Pride and Prejudice.   

2.  Justified.  I have only seen season 1, but I love it.  I have a not-so-secret crush on Timothy Olyphant ever since my dirty favorite show, Deadwood.  And in this show, he does not disappoint.  He is even cuter without that ugly mustache from Deadwood.  and the other characters in this show are great as well. 

3.  Damages.  another FX show.  you can also stream this one on Netflix.  Glenn Close stars, and we were hooked pretty quick.  the second season wasn't quite as good as the first, but it got better.  now we are starting the third season, and I am hopeful.

4.  the Lincoln Lawyer.  i liked this movie.  first time I ever like Matthew Mchonaey (i don't know how to spell it, and i refuse to look it up)

5.  A Perfect Getaway.  not the greatest movie, but it kept us awake and entertained.  michael got it for me on a Friday night.  turned out it had Timothy Olyphant in it.  (He is also strangely in the second season of Damages.  it is weird how he keeps turning up in this list.)

6.  Biutiful.  i watched this one by myself.  it is very long.  took me a few days.  it is heavy and i did some crying if i remember correctly, but it was worth it to see Javier Bardem's acting.  save it for your rainy day blues. 

7.  American Experience: Lewis and Clark.  this may be my favorite.  it was 3 hours that made me feel proud to be an american.  so cheesy sounding, but it was so good.  the older i get, the more history i want to learn.

8.  Kill the Irishman.  a movie about a true story.  its got an irsh man.  i can't tell you much more than that, but it was good.  

i also liked Source Code and Cedar Rapids, and the Kennedys.  they were enjoyable movies.

Do you wonder when i have time to watch these things?  I don't know the answer, but we still only have about 5 tv channels and I like to stay up late.  so I watch my computer when i am exhausted and brain-dead, or doing dishes slowly while the boys are sitting on each other outside on the trampoline.

saving it all

i have no memory.  that is why i believe I could never become a good writer or storyteller.  I cannot remember the funny things that people say or the place and time where meaningful things happen.  Along with being able to sing and play an instrument, this is one of those qualities I wish that I could convince God to change in me.  But so be it for now.  That is probably why He gave me Frank.  He remembers everything.  (for example, he drew this picture at school this week from memory for ford:  how can he remember in such detail)?

{note: take photo, upload photo, then post picture of that photo here}

I have a memory for ridiculous pieces of information that no one cares about.  i can remember exact details of stories I hear about people, I just can't remember the names of the people or where those stories take place.  I can remember smells and weather and the way I used to feel when I play an old album that I played all the time in college.  but its the details that escape me.  That is why blogging was so good for me.  its like a time capsule. 

This week, i had a few things i didn't want to forget.

On wednesday, after frank and i did school together, i threw the tennis ball at his racket a few times, but when we were done, I explained that I would need to go inside for my exercise time with Jillian.

that is, Jillian Michaels, my new exercise buddy who is going to help me lose these last ten pounds and strange knee cellulite that I did not know existed until after having a third baby.  Frank asked if he could exercise with me, and of course I said yes, because after all, homeschooling might as well include PE, and i thought having frank there would make it more fun for me.  frank makes most everything fun.  that's just the way he is.
So we were doing jabs and punches and squats and kicks and Jillian is talking to us, telling us that we need to "make it count", and not to "phone it in," and she is saying "nice job," and frank stops and says:



"Can she really see us?"

and i said: "What do you think?  Do you think she can see us?"

and frank says: "No.  I don't think she can see us, because if she could see me, she would really say, "Um.. I don't think you are doing that right.""

ford's first day of school

 I picked up Ford from mother's day out yesterday.  On thursdays, i let him stay through nap time so as to maximize my thursday time with john (and to be honest - to have just 5 hours of peace and quietness in my week).
As usual, Ford opted not to sleep during his 1 1/2 hours nap time at school.  I don't believe he disrupts the other children, because they have not told me that I have to take him home during this time, but he certainly has not ever taken a nap this year.   As I walked in the dark room yesterday, he immediately bolts up and off of his cot and runs at me.  I ask if he napped, knowing the answer already, and Ms. Heather, his teacher, informs me that he did not.  and ford tells me that he was talking to Bobby Doggie.  and I sigh and say, "oh dear, Fordy."  and he looks at me and pats me on the back and says, "oh dear, Mama." 


Ford really got going with his talking about 6 months ago.  and now he is unstoppable.  he is one of those kids who decides to wait to actually talk until they can speak entire sentences.  and every day I am amazed at what he says and how he says it, and the fact that he actually knows so much more than he ever lets onto.  Ford is, however, too funny to put into words on a blog.  It is more about how he says things than the what he says.  That is why we are trying to get him on video more.  whenever I get organized, i will put a video {   here    }.
Today, a little girl asked him what his name was.  He said, holding up 3 fingers, "i'm two..... and i have blue eyes."  he also started calling everyone "doodyhead" or "boobyhead" or "noodyhead" this week.    this is proving to be a hard habit to break.  If he calls you doodyhead, please don't hold it against him.  forgive us, and know that we are working on it.


john today is 4 months and one day old.  He is one of the greatest gifts I have ever been given.
he laughs out loud.  he is patient with me.  he smiles at everyone he meets.  the only times he cries are when he is overtired, or if someone yells - i can tell he is a peacemaker - he doesn't like it when we are yelling at the other boys.  he is pure joy.  the last two nights he has even blessed me with sleeping through the night again (though, truthfully, I have a sneaking fear that something happened with the monitor that first night, and that perhaps I just did not hear him waking up) but regardless of the reason - he is sleeping, i am so very grateful.

John is my best little buddy.  I know that other women have said it so much more elegantly, but I wish I could describe in words, our special bond.  it is beautiful.  when your babies are still babies, there is nothing like it.  no one can love them like you, and likewise, I am sure that no one has more power than a mama has over her baby.  I don't mean that in a crude awful sort of way, but in a way that fills me with such awe and reverence for my job.

i look at this sweet little man, and i see that every part of who he is - is here because of me.  every centimeter that he grows (forgive my bluntness here) is from the food that goes into my body and then back out to him.  everything that he learns or does not learn at this young age is due to the environment that I put him in.  he learns to smile because we smile at him.  He learns to love because he is loved.  my role in his life is huge right now.
I wish sometimes I could go back and do it all over again with frank.  I wouldn't change one single thing about frank, but just about how I was as a new mom.  i was so nervous and scared to spoil him.  I did not understand almost 6 years ago, that you truly cannot spoil a baby.  all that they need is spoiling and cuddling and smiling and loving.  oh it is curious.  when i had only one baby, and plenty of time to do all that spoiling, i didn't understand how precious that time was.  now that I finally understand, i am so busy that there is not enough time in the day or energy in my body to give all that i want to give to these little men.

yesterday, I was shopping for a dress for the museum opening cocktail party.  a party of whose caliber I have never before, nor likely am ever to be invited to again.  I made friends with an older, not old, but more mature woman who said she has three children, the oldest of which is 21, the middle, 18, and the youngest is 16.  Same age differences as my boys.  she said if she could stop the clock and turn it back to when they were this age, she would do it in a second.  precious.  this time is precious.  how foolish I would be to ever take it for granted.  I feel like it will be gone before i even begin to know what I am doing. 

don't get your hopes up

this does not mean that i will take up regular blog posts again.  i know better than to make promises that i can't keep.  However, i realized two weeks ago that we are at the one year mark of our Arkansas adventure.  I thought that it would be fun to do a year in review.  it has been an amazing year.  it has now taken me two weeks to get this post out.  Since I have started this post, we have moved to a new house and taken our family, including our 7 week old son, on a road trip to colorado - which is where i am now (don't yet have photos of these events in my computer).   As I sit here, I can't come up with the right words to describe this past year.  it has had many surprises, but certainly the blessings have far outweighed the challenges.  Our family, as well as our new church family, has basically carried us through these last two months - some days I have felt like I am just along for the ride.  but the ride has been good, and i have a ridiculous amount of thank you notes that need to be written for all the love we have received.  God has been so kind to us through so many people.


I do not have photos of most of our new friends, or of our church.  I am sad about that.  I have not only not been keeping up this blog, but i have also been terrible at taking photos.  Hopefully John Ransom is the cure for that disease.  he's pretty great. 

So, this is a long and disjointed post.  the photos are mostly un- cropped, un-photoshopped, and truthfully, i have given up putting them in the order i had intended them to be.  it is all taking too long, and if i take any longer to try to make this look good, i will never post them at all.  so here goes:

when their hair was long

lanterns we made for a night walk at Christmastime

GoGo and Papa at Christmas

fordy's first real cleaning at the dentist (note: look for bobby doggie in the next few pictures of ford)

ford has loved playing and reading in frank's bed

a typical scene i find throughout the house at any given time.  this was on the guest bed

a fortress for the star wars Lego men.  2010 - 2011 is the year of Star Wars

ford has learned more names of Star Wars characters from his brother than he knows of his shapes and colors combined. 

a random, not very good photo, but we did love the irises that popped up at our house

one of frank's

our favorite part of the house on Maple street - walking to school.  what a special part of my days this was.  we walked this town together.

sharing Halloween with the Hungarians.  it was their first.

devil's den.  we began our family hiking trips.

ford's first discovery of his soon to be favorite, Lightning McQueen, and the fun of using frank's legos to play with his cars

one of the many times we were without heat/and or air conditioning in this lovely home

frank's drawing of Joseph (note the coat) and Jacob

not too many belly shots of this pregnancy, but we got a few


Below are just some of the visitors we've had over the year.  how blessed we've been in a new town, not to be lonely on the weekends (sidenote, the blogger website is not allowing me to post captions to some of these)

 

we filled the winter months with precious friends.  don needed a trip to Braum's.  i learned that peanut butter on ice cream is pretty delicious

maggie, our houston grandma, what would we ever do without her?

michelle and liam came for a day.  we have been best friends since we were 4 years old. the same age as these boys here. 

the boys learning that they were getting another boy in the family at Hugo's.  if you can't go to Houston's, to open your envelope, Hugo's is a good second choice. 

fordy and sloane got to share their birthdays together.  it was a sweet party of hendersons, guyots, and calloways - we love our family

we finally got a mantel!

and we finally got to make fires.  we LOVE the fireplace

then came the snow. and the sledding.  popee is crazy on a sled

it was a year spent in the sand - either at home or at the park.  we love us some sand

so many days at wilson park - rain or shine

i never get tired of taking pictures of these three.  i promise they are all joyful, lovely people

oh how we love this bathtub.  i am ruined.  i will have one of my own someday - Lord willing

Resurrection Day.  i refuse to post the family picture, because i looked like a whale in toile

and after Easter, the flood that we came home to

in the end, we agree it was a great blessing.  we got rid of so much crap that we had been hanging onto for no good reason

the worst fishing trip of all time

the hailstorm that came less than a week after we bought our new mini van

botanical garden

Frank's last days of preschool.  there was a parent tea - daddy got a tie, mama got a corsage - it was precious

michael's birthday.  frank wanted to surprise him by taking all of us bowling.

we have spent most of the year on this porch - sitting, talking, playing in the rocks and the dirt, and just counting the cars that drive by

pregnant mini golf. just waiting for the baby to arrive

early labor, the night before john was born

the advantage of having your baby at home...just this

 

what needs to be said?

never has a photo more accurately depicted one of my children

my sister has saved my sanity and brought me untold joy this year.  i think she has been to visit us at least four times.  we all love the Hendersons

finally getting to the ice cream truck in time.  pure joy

but nothing has brought us greater joy than this guy.

and then there is this guy.  who always surprises me.  i can't wait to see what the next year brings.